A lot of times families split into two, one party (usually the man) leaves for overseas and the other party (wife and children if any) stay back in Nigeria or vice versa. The plan is that the husband makes preparations for his family to join him.
Sometimes however things do not go as planned and a trip of 3 to 6 months turns into a year or more. Usually what people dream of these countries is far from imagination. The moment they leave the airport, it dawns on them and the hustle begins. Sometimes some men get lucky, they hustle and are successful but a lot of times these guys get carried away and they get stuck. They stop calling the wife they left behind in Nigeria and result to marrying citizens (white ladies, akata etc for ‘papers’). It is so surprising that some spouses even find out about their husbands on face book, twitter or blackberry. These men impregnate the women abroad lie about their marital status and continue to live a lie. Their extended families back home are held ransom as their wives’ families begin to ask questions which they have no answers to. They usually say whatever their son tells them. In some cases some mothers have actually had opportunities to travel to visit their sons and find out the whole truth but they still continue to fool the wife at home.
The wife on the other hand is being mocked by men back home, she becomes a lonely woman, cannot socialize because people ask questions to which she has no answers. Some women even claim not to have their husbands’ telephone numbers and they can only speak to him whenever he calls.
There was a situation where a guy called his wife and she heard a baby crying at the background, she asked her husband whose baby that was but he said he was at a friend’s place only for the child to shout daddy daddy daddy, she said all she could do was drop the phone because all her fears had been confirmed.
A lot of times these wives sacrifice so much, borrow money from friends for the husband to travel, take cash advance from work or I owe you. Well I can continue to give you instances and the list will be endless.
Who do we blame for all these?
Would you blame a woman for cheating when her husband leaves for months without calling on a regular basis?
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